Author: a fool

All alone with Jesus

witnesses to Jesus

I have been continuing to read The Freedom to Become a Christian: A Kierkegaardian Account of Human Transformation in Relationship with God. (I had a very pleasant hour on the beach yesterday reading and watching the waves.)

I just wanted to share two quotes that really struck me:

When Christian conceptions or propositions become the object of the Christian faith (for example, in the form of Christian doctrine), ‘Christianity’ becomes a plaything for intellectual pursuits, cultural sensibilities and political agendas. This is not, of course, to deny that Christian concepts and propositions serve a purpose. Their primary purpose, however, is to serve as a witness to God: to provide us with teaching that helps us to talk about, understand and know both who God is and who we are before God. But, for Kierkegaard, they are not to take centre stage.

The Freedom to Become a Christian, 4.

I was struck by the idea that doctrine etc are witnesses. And that these provide a framework for us to speak about God.

The conclusion that this work seeks to draw is that, for Kierkegaard, Christian belief and understanding are subordinate to a person’s relationship with God. They do not constitute the relationship itself. They are nothing more than a witness to and expression of the fact that God actively relates to us in history.

This is the main aim of the book. And I think this is a really important point to remember: it is all about a relationship. As the author further explains it is about a choice for the Christian life, it is not about conclusions but rather a resolution. (The last part is me!)

receiving

I have been thinking (or should I say “reading about”) posture in prayer. In the mystical tradition is there is an emphases on standing for prayer. I read an article about Julian of Norwich that made the point of “receiving in prayer” with hands open.

I admit that I am often more interested in telling God what to do than receiving anything from Him in my own prayer life. Receive, yes, but after I have told God what I want and need. I really like the above gesture during prayer – open to receiving from God. Being open and empty before the Throne of Grace. Simply allowing myself to be in the presence of Jesus.

I have also watched a couple of YouTube videos on Mount Athos – the self-governing monastic island. I was struck by how the monks simply pray while they work. They recite the Jesus Prayer or a single word. Not long complicated requests of God but simply begging for His mercy.

So I would like to emulate openness and simplicity in my prayer life.

Spotify Greenroom

So, I read about Spotify Greenroom this morning. Yes, it is Clubhouse from Spotify and at the moment I think it is limited – or it might be me! But this would be a great platform for discipleship!!! That can be recorded into a podcast for further use. Anyway, I am excited!

Follow me, @onesolitaryanglican, and I will follow back.

birth of John the Baptist

Today is the festival of the Birth (Nativity) of St John the Baptist. Even APBA has a festival office for the occasion. It is, as a personal note, the liturgical date that I started by journey within the Roman Catholic Church which came to an end almost 12 years later. There is something about that but that is for another post.

John is a hermit-like figure. In iconography, he often has the wings of a messenger and he carries his own decapitated head, a sign of his martyrdom at the hands of Herod. John’s task is to proclaim Jesus knowing that, like Jesus, that will cost his life.

The New Testament illustrates this connection. Mark’s gospel starts with John but quickly moves to Jesus. But there is bridge between the two ministries.

Now after John was arrested, Jesus came to Galilee, proclaiming the good news of God, and saying, “The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near; repent, and believe in the good news.”

Mark 1:14-15

The verb which is used for John’s arrest is the same verb that is used during Jesus’ passion. I think Mark wants us to draw the connection: John shares in Jesus’ cross with his own life. From the outset, he is a martyr – a witness of Jesus in his life. For John that becomes a truth – he is killed for Jesus. But there is a vital connection to my life:

As Jesus passed along the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the sea—for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them, “Follow me and I will make you fish for people.” And immediately they left their nets and followed him. As he went a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John, who were in their boat mending the nets. Immediately he called them; and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men, and followed him.

Mark 1:16-20

The previous passage is followed by the calling of the first disciples in Mark’s gospel. It is interesting that John’s call to martyrdom – call to be a witness in his life – is followed by Jesus saying, “Follow me”. The call of faith is to face Jesus’ cross and my own cross. The call is one to sacrificial living as a witness of Jesus.

So blessed feast to all!!!

my inwardness

I wonder if Søren felt like I sometimes do – that while my public Christian self can lead Bible studies and discuss theology, I am oddly hesitant to speak about my raw, honest connection with God – unlike the many forthright people who open their faithful hearts to anyone who will listen. I resonate with Søren as he reflects on his personal spiritual life: “My inwardness is too true for me to be able to talk about it.”

Praying with Kierkegaard

I am going to leave that as is!

Chernobyl

I watched the mini-series Chernobyl. I know there are issues with it – especially about what did and did not actually happen. As always the characters made it real for me. And, I admit, I still mourn Lane Pryce!

Surrender to the universal or stand by yourself. Advancement vs authenticity. What makes this more impactful is that these are real people with real choices. I was really struck by the end when pictures of the actual people are shown with their stories. And the personal cost of their choices.

Life is about choices. I think it is human nature to escape into the faceless crowd and push responsibility to an abstract. “I was just doing my duty”! The essence of faith is that I stand alone before God. I answer for me. That is really lonely in an existential sense. In the end, no one knows my pain or hurt, no one but me. There are things that go on in my head that only God knows. And He still loves me!!! Maybe the start of authenticity is accepting that I am alone before God?And the end is accepting that I am loved anyway!

life goes on

Last night was the last Bible Study for this term. I have mixed feelings about it. The night before I had another meeting. Both ended up being more stressful than I had thought – my fault not the meetings. I have a full day of meetings some of which I have no desire for. So I did not sleep well and I have woken with a headache (a by-product of the medication I am on).

I woke thinking about the above song. I was especially thinking about the line, “life goes on long after the thrill of living is gone”. In my 50s I am forced to completely restart. I have literally come back to my teenage years sleeping in the same bed, working in the same room, living in the same house. And I am not sure I can do it again!!!

Anyway, life goes on!

discipleship pathway

Until very recently I had not heard of discipleship pathways. I must admit, after reading about it a little online, I can see how a clear road for discipleship can be extremely helpful. So here is a link to a post I found helpful: How to Create a Discipleship Pathway.

I want to share just one point:

Celebrating success – which shapes your culture – becomes trickier if people have different views on what success looks like.

We need to be facing the same direction and aiming for the same goal.