Category: Personal

stop looking outside

If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be and why?

I am not sure this is a skill but I would like to take my own advice. I would love to actually live my life according to my own standards. And the most important one is that I should stop looking outside of me for value. No community, no institution, and no person will ever give me value when I do not value myself. The impossible dream!

Or maybe play a musical instrument or be able to draw? Or maybe swimming?

not much …

What is one way you have grown this year?

How have I grown this year? I do not feel I have, There is, however, one thing which I realised that make a difference in my life.

There is no standard for growth. There is no abstraction against which my growth is measured. In fact, there are few standards against which I am measured. Or, to put it another way, there is no institutional answer for a personal question. The last virtue of a modern world is conformity – and the greatest sin. Looking for anything outside of me is going to disappoint. I stand alone before God.

waiting …

There is, for me, a deep difference between longing and expectation.

In expectation, there is a demand – a standing in line, impatiently wondering, When will the line move?

In longing, there is a request – and a willingness to wait.

The waiting itself becomes a connection. When I truly ask – when my longing is genuine – I am open. Open even to pain, open even to disappointment.

This is living in the full force of life.

But when I am in expectation, I am demanding: The experience must come to pass! Do not disturb me now!

Ragen, Akiva ; רגן, עקיבא. The Secret of the Encounter: An existential interpretation of the book ‘I and Thou’ by Martin Buber, 8-9.

it is about me

What is something you wish you could tell your 20-year-old self?

Control what you have the power to control. And let the rest look after itself. Especially people – they make their own mistakes.

Do not worry what other people think or do – you do “you”! And do not let the “maybe” outcome stop you!

a question

So here is a question I was wondering about the other day:

What makes your “church”
different from a cult?

Would the answer be something like, “we are right, they are wrong”? Well, that means ever single individual is someone else’s “cult” or heretic. Maybe, as a general thought, we can dump the concept of “right and wrong”?

Also, as an aside, why do we assume so much about cults? The leaders are manipulative and evl. They know they are wrong and are doing it for some self-serving end. I think most people are honest about their beliefs – members and leaders of cult are no different. Let’s start from this point!!!! While some may have nefaris aims, I believe most cult leaders believe what they preach. And, some clergy do not.

I do not expect answers.