sacrifice

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Romans 12:1-2 (KJV)

The above is from Second Evensong for Candlemas. It reminded me of one of the post-communion prayers In the Second Order in APBA:

Father,
we offer ourselves to you
as a living sacrifice
through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Send us out in the power of your Spirit
to live and work to your praise and glory.

What does “sacrifice” mean in these two texts? Not death. Perhaps we could define it as the surrender of a good (body in Romans) for a greater good (life in Jesus).

BTW: Augustine makes the opposite his definition of sin:

On account of all these, and such as these, is sin committed; while through an inordinate preference for these goods of a lower kind, the better and higher are neglected — even You, our Lord God, Your truth, and Your law.

Confessions 2:5:10

So, the choice between higher and lower goods is the root of sin and sacrifice.

Anyway …

be me

Daily writing prompt
Something on your “to-do list” that never gets done.
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I do not use “to-do lists”. I have never used them. But the one item I know will never get done is “be me”. Or maybe, “stop wearing masks”. I am unsure why but I know I hide and censor “me”. Perhaps life has taught me to be more like everyone else? Maybe life has taught me that no one will like “me”? So masks it is – pretending and play-acting something that I am not.

cat!

Daily writing prompt
Write about your first computer.
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My first computer was a Dick Smith’s Cat. I started with a tape drive but later got a floppy disk drive – the big one. It was a cool computer to start with and it taught me lots about computing. It had Basic installed so I learned to program. And, if I remember right, I wrote a “V” game with sound.

what is “all”?

I have been sick – not much sleep for the last two days. I am not sure how well my medication is working – I guess I will know when I get withdrawals. Anyway, I dreamt last night that I was walking into a church – a nondescript building which I somehow knew was a church. King of strange as I have not been to church for six weeks. There was no person in the church but a hymn was playing:

All to Jesus I surrender,
All to him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust him,
In his presence daily live.

Chorus:
I surrender all,I surrender all,
All to thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

All to Jesus I surrender;
Make me, Savior, wholly thine;
Let me feel the Holy Spirit,
Truly know that thou art mine.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Lord, I give myself to thee,
Fill me with thy love and power,
Let thy blessing fall on me.

Sometimes I remember my dreams. (I cannot know if I ever forget a dream!) The first thing that came to mind this morning was: What does “all” mean in this hymn? “All to Jesus I surrender – Lord, I give myself to thee”.

Maybe let me put it another way!? Does “all” include:

  • the institution of the church? or any institution?
  • the desire for certainty in this world? To find absolutes in either the community or the book?
  • morality?
  • duty?
  • family?
  • other people?

Anyway …

leave

What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?

Leave my current context! I know I should, I have been told by people I trust that I need to, and my heart says that this is no longer home. But it is so difficult for me to even think about it.

I say that I will when someone else acts. But it should be me. I have outstayed my welcome and really need to move on.

But …

silent rebellion

AM Allchin’s The Silent Rebellion is a book on religious life in the Church of England. I do not have a copy but I am looking for one.

It is often pointed out that the title, The Silent Rebellion, highlights the need for solitude for religious life. Yet, why “rebellion”? In what sense is it “a violent uprising“?

While I do not have an answer, this quote may help:

Their name itself, anchorite, means rule-breaker, the one who does not fulfil his public duties.

And maybe this one by Kierkegaard:

…Of this there is no doubt, our age and Protestantism in general may need the monastery again, or wish it were there. The “monastery” is an essential dialectical element in Christianity. We therefore need it out there like a navigation buoy at sea in order to see where we are, even though I myself would not enter it. But if there really is true Christianity in every generation there must also be individuals who have this need…

And from Fear and Trembling:

Faith is exactly this paradox, that the single individual is higher than the universal, but in such a way, mind you, that the movement is repeated, so that after having been in the universal he now as the particular keeps to himself as higher than the universal.

The tragic hero resigns himself in order to express the universal; the knight of faith resigns the universal in order to become the single individual.

The knight of faith, the rebel, stands with Jesus alone even against institutions. There is nothing higher than the individual’s relationship with Jesus – not even religion!

Anyway …

five wounds

O LORD Jesus Christ, Son of the living God, who didst come down from heaven to earth from the bosom of the Father, and didst bear five wounds on the Cross, and didst pour forth thy precious Blood for the remission of our sins: we humbly beseech thee; that at the day of judgement we may be set at thy right hand, and hear from thee that most comfortable word, Come ye blessed into my Father’s Kingdom; who livest and reignest with the Father, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, ever one God, world without end. Amen.