Author: a fool

I have been thinking that two concepts I do not really grasp are irony and paradox. So I thought I would share the following quote:

The more common type of irony, he says, is irony in which something that is a jest is said as if it were meant seriously. The rarer type of irony, the type he himself exemplifies, is when an author says something serious but does so in the form of a jest.

C. Stephen Evans. Kierkegaard on Faith and the Self: Collected Essays (Provost) 207-208.

I think the important thing, for me, in the above is that irony is about ideas or speech. And paradox, therefore, is about existence. I think the two can overlap and sometimes something is said to be ironic when in fact it is paradoxical, in the Kierkegaardian way of seeing things. But both confront us with the absurdity of life or of a particular idea.

I think it is all related to communication. And, for me, it is related to the paradox of the incarnation – how I am called to proclaim a Person who is a paradox.

I am speaking to the youth tonight on what it means to be a human being. That is a rather big topic so I am bringing it down to a simple question, “what does it mean to be me?”. Maybe a simple question but one that is hard to answer. I think I have escaped into other people’s description of me to not face the question of what defines me. And I have often not heard the voice of Jesus that says, “you are so much more!”.

You know I love the Instagram page “The Depression Chronicles”. It often has ideas that I very much identify with and that help me with my balance. I have extremely vivid dreams – not so much recently – and I overthink. But is overthinking bad? Yes, when it runs around in circles. But it also allows me to analyse, organise, see the problem from any different angles, and engage an idea on a much deeper level.

Overthinking is not bad! Overthinking something that I cannot fix or that is outside of my control is not helpful to me or to others. The gifts that come with it are to be celebrated. My job is to see when my overthinking is negative for me versus when I am using it in a positive way.

I have found that people use words to describe me and I simply accept their view of me. Between their description and my defining myself is a choice – do I accept their view of me? Do I accept that what they say is negative is, in fact, negative? Being me is not a “cooking cutter”.

Anyone that is what I am thinking of saying to the youth tonight.

While most people would think I am “red”, I am “green” but not with random people. I need to trust you!!! (And I never want to invade other people’s personal space.)

You may have guessed, I published a few posts that I have been working on behind the scenes this morning. They are thoughts that have been bouncing around my head. I am glad that in the midst of some very stressful events on the horizons, I have not entered the darkness but rather have been reading and thinking. In the past creative periods have often been followed by extreme darkness. With more insight and thanks to my counsellor, I can handle the darkness better and live with it rather than exhaust myself in fight against it.

So I saw this on Instagram:

I cannot agree more! Ok, that sounds a little egotistical and self-validating but I do not mean it that way. And I would say that the comment stands within the Kierkegaardian tradition!

I like the phrasing, “prioritize shared beliefs over shared relationship”. Jesus first then the community. Or community in our shared relationship with Jesus. I know that I will not find another person who agrees with me in theory on Jesus because my experience of Jesus is individual and personal. And that is the mystery of the incarnation.

Anyway, I pray you have a Jesus filled day!

As Jesus was walking beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon called Peter and his brother Andrew. They were casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” At once they left their nets and followed him.

Matthew 4:18-20

I have been thinking about the “mission” of the people of God in a digital age. Since Covid-19 we have communicated in completely new ways. And there is no going back! We can no longer repeat the same methods that worked (or not) in the past. We cannot rely on people seeking out the church. Religion as a whole has lost most of the influence it had in the past. And all of that is actually good news!!

The task of each individual who has a relationship with Jesus is to “follow Him”. It is that simple! And part of that life is to be a “fisher of people”. But the simple fact that my relationship with Jesus is about “following Him” means I am called to reach out to people and proclaim the Kingdom of God, to proclaim the person of Jesus, to other people.

I want to write more about the theology of mission in a digital age. I think there is much to be written about but, more importantly, much to be done. And most of what is to be done is not artificial but the very centre of my relationship with Jesus.

I would be interested in people’s thoughts on mission, especially in what Jesus’ mission consists.

[the individual] is incognito, but [their] incognito consists precisely in looking just like everyone else.

Kierkegaard: Concluding Unscientific Postscript (Cambridge Texts in the History of Philosophy), 345.

Kierkegaard writes the above in his broader discussion of monasticism.

The individual does not stop being a human being, take off finitude’s motley in order to be dressed in the abstract garb of the monastery.

344

Kierkegaard’s gripe with monasticism is that monasticism is worldly defining itself by distinction in changing their dress (and name). The issue of dress is one of making oneself different from everyone else and that is the attitude of the world. Ok, the discussion is a little more involved!

So the quote about being incognito is not anti-monasticism but against the idea of being different in religious life. For me, it speaks of being “human” while being anonymous. To be anonymous in Jesus by looking just like everyone else! To fully live for Jesus while looking just like everyone else!

So the lesson for me? It is not about being outwardly different but about being inwardly attached to Jesus. It is about a relationship that is at the same time extremely private and life transforming.

… Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.

1 Corinthians 8:1b

The above was part of the reading from Evening Prayer tonight. I was so struck by it. I like Paul’s theme of “building up” and that, I think, should be the major image that the church uses for ministry and mission. My call in Jesus is always to “build up” – to call myself and others to transcendence. And that is what love does!! So what motivates me is love and what I do is build up.

I am looking forward to watching The Chosen as a church community. It will be good for us to get together and watch this incredible series.

I think one of the things modern Christians struggle with is that we have made sin an action so holiness has become an action also. We have wholeheartedly adopted a juridicial image of justification and elevated the “Jesus for me” to be the only image that we proclaim.

Therefore, sin is things I do wrong and holiness is things I do right. While I agree that faith needs to lead to a life of following Jesus, it is Jesus in me (the relationship and intimacy between Jesus and the individual) which brings holiness. Holiness is abiding in Jesus, remaining in His love, and the intimacy between Jesus and the Father. It is less about looking backwards (to what I have done wrong) to looking forwards (to Jesus as the final end of my life).

Jesus does not want perfection, He wants my heart!

I just wanted to share the above from Instagram. I really identify with it and I have struggled with being a male who feels things deeply and often, in last three months, has cried. In fact, I cannot recall a day when I have not cried in the last three months.

Now the real insight for me is that I can see the above as a negative. But it is only negative if I force myself into an image of maleness that is given to me by others. All of the above is a positive. Yes, I feel things deeply and I cry. That just makes me human. And some of the gifts that brings to others is a huge positive in my life and in other people’s lives.

I like the above quote because I have moved from seeing it all as a disease that needs to be removed to a gift that needs to be celebrated. Yes, I struggle and I am not like most males or people. But the gifts that being a sensitive male brings much outweighs the negatives and struggles.

I pray you have Jesus filled day!