a fool and his prayer book

It follows, therefore, since the Office flows from the Eucharist, that there will be great variability as to how the Office is recited or offered. I know of one solitary who recites out loud, verse by verse, the whole Office by day and by night with all the appropriate bodily actions as in Choir. For another the Office may gradually become more interiorised so that the words of Scripture and psalmody are embodied by the Jesus Prayer or some other form of rhythmic prayer.

Allchin, A.M; Louf OCSO, Dom André; Ware, Metropolitan Kallistos; Walls, Fr Roland; Ward SLG, Sr Benedicta; Clare SLG, Mother Mary. Solitude and Communion: Papers on the Hermit Life (Fairacres Publications) . SLG Press.

Affective piety is most commonly described as a style of highly emotional devotion to the humanity of Jesus, particularly in his infancy and his death, and to the joys and sorrows of the Virgin Mary. It was a major influence on many varieties of devotional literature in late-medieval Europe, both in Latin and in the vernacular. … Affective piety can be described as a type of highly emotional devotion, focused on the humanity of Jesus, which developed during the High Middle Ages. Anselm of Canterbury, Bernard of Clairvaux, and Francis of Assisi each played a key role in the development of this approach to spirituality. Traces of an affective sensitivity can be found in Late Antiquity, when clergymen preached sermons with vivid descriptions of the Passion.

Affective Piety

The spirituality of Ancrene Wisse is affective … Incarnational spirituality, expressed in devotion to the Passion of Christ and in eucharistic piety centring on the presence of Christ in the consecrated Host, is at the heart of Ancrene Wisse. The spirituality of Ancrene Wisse is essentially incarnational: within the anchorhold the anchoresses could share the suffering of their lover, Christ.

Ancrene Wisse: From Pastoral Literature to Vernacular Spirituality, Cate Gunn

I like being alone! Not that people are bad or evil. I like being with people but being alone feels much more natural.

Yet the desire to be liked, the desire to be heard, the desire to be an authority, remains. Or, in other words, to seek love in return for love.

Purity of heart is the desire for Jesus alone. That is the aim of the solitary life. Not to escape or be a “spiritual master”. But to turn to Christ wholeheartedly. And allow my actions to follow!

Anyway …

The Amish fascinate me. They are counter-cultural, “separatist”, and really nice dressers. The above video has meaningful insights, especially the language of sin (starting at about 12 minutes).

So what is sin? I am not going to offer a definition. But I will offer an alternative view: accountability. Rather than seeing it in terms of action, maybe we could see it in terms of being accountable for my actions. “Alone before God”. Sin is the state of being “outside of relationship”, expresses itself in actions, and makes me accountable to God for the good of my neighbour.

I am free to act but always accountable (to God) for those actions. Any particular action may not break the Ten Commandments (with “hate in the heart”) but still not be for the good of another.

Mondays are often difficult for me. Sunday is the one day a week I go outside of the Anchorage. On Monday mornings, I cook (often for the week) and prepare for the rest of the week. But it is the day I struggle most to find some peace.

Why? The conversations of “yesterday” are at the front of my mind. It makes time to move them to my heart where they become my prayer. I try to pray for all people I encounter, especially those who are part of my community of faith. But my human side often takes over at the start of the week and I replay conversations (and my depression tries to find hidden motives and intents).

So today I celebrate the Nativity of St John the Baptist. Witness to Jesus and messenger. Not always popular, not always sociable. The first “Jesus” solitary. I wonder if he ever struggled with Mondays?

Oh, Master, make me chaste and celibate – but not yet.