I like being alone! Not that people are bad or evil. I like being with people but being alone feels much more natural.
Yet the desire to be liked, the desire to be heard, the desire to be an authority, remains. Or, in other words, to seek love in return for love.
Purity of heart is the desire for Jesus alone. That is the aim of the solitary life. Not to escape or be a “spiritual master”. But to turn to Christ wholeheartedly. And allow my actions to follow!
Anyway …
The Amish fascinate me. They are counter-cultural, “separatist”, and really nice dressers. The above video has meaningful insights, especially the language of sin (starting at about 12 minutes).
So what is sin? I am not going to offer a definition. But I will offer an alternative view: accountability. Rather than seeing it in terms of action, maybe we could see it in terms of being accountable for my actions. “Alone before God”. Sin is the state of being “outside of relationship”, expresses itself in actions, and makes me accountable to God for the good of my neighbour.
I am free to act but always accountable (to God) for those actions. Any particular action may not break the Ten Commandments (with “hate in the heart”) but still not be for the good of another.
Mondays are often difficult for me. Sunday is the one day a week I go outside of the Anchorage. On Monday mornings, I cook (often for the week) and prepare for the rest of the week. But it is the day I struggle most to find some peace.
Why? The conversations of “yesterday” are at the front of my mind. It makes time to move them to my heart where they become my prayer. I try to pray for all people I encounter, especially those who are part of my community of faith. But my human side often takes over at the start of the week and I replay conversations (and my depression tries to find hidden motives and intents).
So today I celebrate the Nativity of St John the Baptist. Witness to Jesus and messenger. Not always popular, not always sociable. The first “Jesus” solitary. I wonder if he ever struggled with Mondays?
Oh, Master, make me chaste and celibate – but not yet.
To know what to do and to be ready to do it are two completely different things.
I have known for some time that I am called to more enclosure – more solitude. And I prayed that God may grant me that gift. But am I ready for it? Today is a day of change. I finish one calling and enter more deeply into another. And I return to a much older one. With Your help, O Lord!
Do continue to practice diligently what I then, as if giving birth, instilled in your ear: “Weep before the Lord.” That is, you should ask of God only one thing: that you may desire Christ alone in wounded love, and that you may with full concentration of your heart and with all your soul wish for him alone as your dowry.
Otter, Monika C. Goscelin of St Bertin: The Book of Encouragement and Consolation [Liber Confortatorius]
The anchorite’s role and influence in the community was a byproduct of his spiritual life rather than something envisaged as its purpose. The initial obligations went rather in the other direction: Wulfric sought an encounter with God and counted on the community to provide the necessary conditions.
John of Ford. The Life of Wulfric of Haselbury, Anchorite (Cistercian Fathers Series Book 79)
To be solitary (in Jesus) is to not be productive (in a worldly sense).
Things are changing – aren’t they always!?
Today in 1841, Marian Rebecca Hughes made private vows before Edward Bouverie Pusey – the first woman to take religious vows in the Anglican church since the Reformation. So maybe today’s festival should be “All Saints of Anglican Religious Life”?
Wulfric of Haselbury was an anchorite, recluse, solitary priest. Know for his healing and insight. He lived the life of a solitary next to St Michael and All Angels Church in Haselbury Plucknett, Somerset. I am encouraged that while he worked well with the vicar, he was never “licensed” to this life by his bishop. He was, in the original sense, a house ascetic. He said Mass in his inner cell and spoke to people in his outer cell.
Sometimes, to be honest, God moves and I am not ready for it. I felt the need to surrender above all the desire to be heard and trusted: to be the person with the answers. Or, to put it differently, the desire to be loved by people. I need to desire to be friends with people (rather than using them for my own ends).
Today is Day 594 in The Anchorage. Circumstances mean my “solitary life” is going to be more defined. And I am not ready. “Maybe tomorrow, Lord!!!”
I adore you, Lord Jesus Christ, hanging upon the Cross, and bearing on your head a crown of thorns: I beseech you, Lord Jesus Christ, that your cross may free me from the avenging Angel.
I adore you, Lord Jesus Christ, wounded upon the cross, drinking vinegar and gall: I beseech you, Lord Jesus Christ, that your wounds may be my remedy.
I adore you Lord Jesus, placed in the tomb, laid in myrrh and spices: I beseech you, Lord Jesus Christ, that your death may be my life.
I adore you, Lord Jesus Christ, descending into hell, liberating the captives: I beseech you, never let me enter there.
I adore you, Lord Jesus Christ, rising from the dead, ascending into heaven and sitting on the right hand of the Father: have mercy on me, I beseech you.
O Lord Jesus Christ, the good shepherd, preserve the righteous, make righteous the sinners, have mercy on all the faithful: and be gracious to me, a sinner.
O Lord Jesus Christ, I ask you for the sake of that most bitter suffering which you bore for my sake upon the cross, and above all when your most noble soul left your most holy body: have mercy on my soul at its departing. Amen. We adore you O Christ and we bless you, Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world. Lord hear my prayer. And let my cry come to you.
We adore you O Christ and we bless you, Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world. Lord hear my prayer. And let my cry come to you.
The prayer:
O most kindly Lord Jesus Christ: turn upon me, a miserable sinner, those eyes of mercy with which you beheld Peter in [Caiaphas’] court, and Mary Magdalene at the banquet, and the thief on the gibbet of the cross: and grant that with blessed Peter I may worthily lament my sins, with Mary Magdalene may perfectly serve you, and with the thief may behold you eternally in heaven. Who live and reign with the Father and the Holy Spirit, God for ever and ever.
Duffy, Eamon. The Stripping of the Altars: Traditional Religion in England, 1400-1580 (pp. 325-326). Yale University Press.
A few quotes from The Friendly Recluse: Medieval hermits were the agony aunts of their day.
Hermits, anchorites and anchoresses (men or women who lived enclosed in a small cell in a church) were holy figures with looser ties to ecclesiastical authorities and more autonomy than those who lived in formal religious communities. … their nature was one of isolation and ‘the solitary combat of the desert’.
While the degree of social contact medieval recluses had differed, there is evidence to suggest that they were the agony aunts of their day, often flying in the face of the recommendations of religious authorities. … The scholar of medieval devotional literature, Michelle M. Sauer, has said that while ‘The anchorite, in theory, was utterly alone in the cell … the reality of this lifestyle was quite different’ and ‘anchoresses were sought out by devout Christians and courted by towns, becoming a visible sign of holiness and protection’
The whole article is interesting – a good introduction to some of the literature. And, the main purpose, a town advertising for hermit/anchorite is a solid idea that many more modern towns should consider.
a fool and his prayer book 