Category: Anglican

Psalm 62

The following is Psalm 62 from Common Worship: Daily Prayer.

Refrain:    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul.


1    On God alone my soul in stillness waits;  ♦
from him comes my salvation.
2    He alone is my rock and my salvation,  ♦
my stronghold, so that I shall never be shaken.
3    How long will all of you assail me to destroy me,  ♦
as you would a tottering wall or a leaning fence?
4    They plot only to thrust me down from my place of honour;
lies are their chief delight;  ♦
they bless with their mouth, but in their heart they curse.
5    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul;  ♦
for in him is my hope.
6    He alone is my rock and my salvation,  ♦
my stronghold, so that I shall not be shaken. [R]
7    In God is my strength and my glory;  ♦
God is my strong rock; in him is my refuge.
8    Put your trust in him always, my people;  ♦
pour out your hearts before him, for God is our refuge.
9    The peoples are but a breath,
the whole human race a deceit;  ♦
on the scales they are altogether lighter than air.
10  Put no trust in oppression; in robbery take no empty pride;  ♦
though wealth increase, set not your heart upon it.
11  God spoke once, and twice have I heard the same,  ♦
that power belongs to God.
12  Steadfast love belongs to you, O Lord,  ♦
for you repay everyone according to their deeds.

Refrain:    Wait on God alone in stillness, O my soul.

O God, teach us to seek security,
not in money or theft,
not in human ambition or malice,
not in our own ability or power,
but in you, the only God,
our rock and our salvation.

words …

Some words from the Glossary:

Contemplative

A Religious whose life is concentrated on prayer inside the monastery or convent rather than on social work or ministry outside the house. Some communities were founded with the specific intention of leading a contemplative lifestyle together. Others may have a single member or small group living such a vocation within a larger community oriented to outside work.

Enclosed

This term is applied to Religious who stay within a particular convent or monastery – the ‘enclosure’ – to pursue more effectively a life of prayer. They would usually only leave the enclosure for medical treatment or other exceptional reasons. This rule is intended to help the enclosed Religious be more easily protected from the distractions and attentions of the outside world.

to continue?

Every year I have the same question: renew this blog or not?

I have not posted a lot in the past year and, from a completely self-centered egotistical point of view, this blog has had relatively small views. Is there something to be said for continuing?

Maybe the answer needs to come from within and not from the outside: do I see a point to continue? Yes, I do! I like writing even if I do it sporadically. I journal in my private life but do not feel comfrotable moving that into the public sphere. So this blog fills an in-between space? I think I have little to say academically – a past dream that has been lost in the darkness of the past. I worry about criticism and all the negative space of the blogosphere. My journal allows me to put into words on a page what is going on inside and it helps me to manage that space. So this blog is the next step: putting my life into words for the outside world.

The solitary life, by its existentialist stance and choice, is a proclamation of a paradox – life is more than productivity. It is also a life of waiting. Maybe these are themes I need to explore this year? I would also like to think aloud about the contemplative life within Anglicanism – is it possible or desirable?

So you have me for another year!

baptism and religious

The Religious life is way of living the Christian life. It is a particular way of living out the call to be a Christian and for a person to live out their baptismal promises. It is not therefore something exotic. At root this life is a call to prayer and service. God has called many people through the centuries to the life of a ‘Religious’. To those who hear such a call, it is demanding yet joyful, a way to find God and relate to the challenges of our 21st-century society.

What is a vocation?

religious life

Fr Henry Power Bull was Superior General of the Society of St John the Evangelist and the following is from the First Anglo-Catholic Congress:

The Religious Life is that state, or form, of life in which, obediently to the inspiration or call of God, a soul is consecrated to God in Jesus Christ under perpetual vows of Poverty, Chastity, and Obedience. There are many forms of this consecration, as there are also many objects with which is it is undertaken; and the Church has need of all. But strictly for the Religious state, as it exists in the Catholic Church, there is required the entire and permanent surrender of self, according to some fixed and recognised rule based upon the Evangelical Counsels, that is, upon the observance of a real spirit of Poverty, Chastity, and Obedience.

And about the enclosed life from the Cowley Evangelist:

It is no self-centred idle life, no dream of prayer, or following of self-will. It is a burning desire of love to die to self and to live to God, in great humility, and with an ever increasing intensity of worship and self-oblation.

more of less?

What could you do less of?

I think the answer is pretty simple for me – feeling sad. It is still a regular part of my life. Not a part I rejoice in or celebrate. But it is part of me. To be honest, it helps when I have a solid plan for each day. Maybe what I could do less of is define myself by other people and what they expect of me? Or, maybe, I could stop feeling things so deeply?

Yes, I take medication. But the medication is not the answer – it only stops it from bubbling to the surface where it becomes uncontrollable. I have a general feeling of uselessness and being a “third wheel”. I no longer think about ending it. That is a positive!

I cannot change others, I can only change myself. So this is my problem and not someone else’s. I can try to escape into the arms of other people and hope they can fix it. But I have tried that and it was a disaster. I keep saying that everything will become clear but to be honest, I no longer believe that.

Sorry that is a little bit of a downer first thing. It is a positive that I know what my negative is?!

The Anchorage

What big events have taken place in your life over the past year?

I moved into The Anchorage. There are plenty of other things but that is the one I chose to remember. The last two years have been a rollercoaster ride of emotion and self-discovery. It has been far from pleasant or edifying. I often wonder if I can keep going even now.

I am testing my vocation to the solitary life within a parish context. In the past, I may have been called an anchorite – in the English sense rather than the Orthodox. I pray, meditate, and read. I also have a few things I do within the parish related to my life as a solitary. I am often amazed at how ordinary my life is really. But I am only testing my vocation! For the last couple of weeks, I have been thinking about the traditional monastic orders and wondering if I might be called to community. That is for another day!

So the major event is my move to The Anchorage. I dearly love this place. I have a house guest – Fred, the rabbit. But otherwise, I am alone. I have been trying to work on my mental health and my relationships.

wild animals

Do you ever see wild animals?

Another prompt! Do I see wild animals?

Well, I see birds in my front yard – they make a lot of noise, especially in the spring. The birds remind me of St Anthony and his time in the cave. When he wanted to fast, the birds brought him bread to eat. Silence is not an absence of noise.

I also have a rabbit, Fred, who is not really wild but who keeps me company. He has become very comfortable in The Anchorage. He likes to run and jump – as rabbits do.

But I see and hear people who come home from various night spots every weekend. Are they wild animals? Not really – just people living a life different to mine. Sometimes they make a lot of noise. But often they sing or talk while they walk back to their cars.